One of the very sacred things of my job is that most of the time, I meet mamas and daddies when they are at their most vulnerable stage of parenting. When it is hard, and ugly, and they feel lost and alone.
The first thing I always tell them is that I will not judge. I will not punish you or shame you or (insert whatever fear they might have). I am here to help. I am here to remind you to breathe again. I am here to say, you got this.
And then we get to the hard heart work.
But just before, when they register, I always leave a line in for them to tell me something that they are proud of.
I do this deliberately. I do this because I want to remind them that in the midst of the crazy and the chaos and all the places they think that they are failing, there are also so many parts that are worth celebrating.
These have been some of my very favorite answers:
“When we first came home from the hospital, I was terrified that I had to keep such a defenseless little person happy and alive. Now I’m proud to say I not only managed that, but I throughly enjoy being a mother.”
“I’m proud that I managed to breastfeed for 9 months because it hurt so much and was so hard sometimes.”
“That I didn’t care what people said and left my professional job as a pharmacist to become a stay at home mom and never regretted that decision.”
“Even with all the changes my son has been through and as boisterous and rough as he can be, he has a huge gentle heart and to see him gently kiss his sister when she cries or tap you on the back and say “Ok mummy” when I have hurt myself just fills me with pride that he can be so perceptive to others feelings.”
“I’m proud of how my husband and I have leaned on each other to raise our first child away from home, family and friends.”
Whether today was a “good” day or a “bad” day for you, I hope you take a moment to celebrate your motherhood. The hard things, the great things, the parts that you are so very proud of and remember that feeling always.
If you’d like to know more about my parent workshops, please feel free to message me. I’d love to connect with you!